I was even more saddened by the comments that people left after reading the article, such as:
"I happen to think that in this day and age, having a child is the more selfish of the two choices."
"I have to agree that married people without kids are probably happier. I know my husband and I were. I love my kids who are now 20 & 22 but if I had to do it over again I think we would have chosen to remain childless. Sure there were wonderful times but once they got older & started school, it became less wonderful. Perhaps if my husband and I shared a parenting style it would have been less difficult but it's too late now. When you really think about it do people have children for the right reasons or just because it is expected of them?"
Ok, I haven't been a mother for that long but honestly, I have never been so happy before. Every day I wake up and know that I am doing something sacred and wonderful, and that alone brings me great happiness. I love the quote by Julie Beck in this month's VT'ing message:
"Women have distinct assignments given to them from before the foundation of the world...These are vital responsibilities in the plan of happiness, and when women embrace those roles with all their hearts, they are happy!"
I couldn't agree more! Yes, parenting is difficult and sometimes not very fun. No, I can't do all the things I could do before I was a parent, but I wouldn't trade my child for the so called "freedom" that you have being without children. Has my marital happiness decreased? Heck, no! Seeing my husband as a father makes me love him a hundred times more. We actually appreciate our marriage much more now just because of the extra effort we have to spend making our time together special. The point that I am trying to make is that being a mother and KNOWING my divine purpose and embracing it with all my heart makes life truly joyful and everyday worth living to its fullest!
5 comments:
Those who choose to remain childless will never experience all of the trials and frustrations that come with parenting. They will also never experience the exquisite joy and satisfaction that can come with parenting. It's one of the principles that we have to learn in this life; if we choose safety and security, and never extend ourselves outside of our own comfort box, we may be "happy" enough in our own right, but we will never experience the greater joys and blessings available to those who choose to have children in their relationships.
As an older guy who's getting into the next phase of family, I can say that it is definitely worth it in the long run.
I love that quote from Julie B. Beck. I think the key is that the women need to EMBRACE their role as a mother--not look at it as something temporary until their "real life" starts. I cannot imagine my life without my beautiful kids. I certainly feel that my life (especially my marriage) wasn't fully utilized until we started having kids. How sad that people choose to miss out on that fulfillment.
I read another article along these same lines yesterday. It'd be hysterically funny if it weren't true.
Here, here! I agree.
I'm not too sure of their definition of 'happy'.
Like if by happier they mean say 'less stressed' or 'more well rested because they get to sleep longer than parents do' then I get their point. *Though I don't think it's happy, it's just higher levels of Calm because you're not worrying that Jimmy broke his arm or where Susie is when she stayed out past curfew*
It is sad that they'd wave that as a banner for not having kids. 'Stay happier longer' Because children are the only lasting legacy we have. Everything else will fade and crumble into dust, but the child that you loved and nurtured will go on and pass that love on in many ways.
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